Ed's Revenge
by The Mysterious Thing
Summary: Ed gets his revenge on everyone who's ever called him short, pipsqueak, midget, tiny person, etc. [SPOILERS IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHO PRIDE OR SLOTH ARE]
1. Revenge

This is a story about Ed getting his revenge on all the people who say he's short, a midget, a runt, a pipsqueak, a tiny person, and all those kind of things.

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA or the Sims

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Ed sat at a desk playing on the computer.

"Brother what are you doing?" Al questioned

"Creating Sims"

"Who"

"Roy"

"Anyone else?"

"Nope"

"Just one?"

"Just one"

"Why?"

"He must be perfect"

"Oh"

----Two hours later----

Ed still sat at the same desk playing the Sims on the same computer.

"Brother have you built Roy's house yet?"

"No"

"What have you been doing?"

"Killing Sims" Ed points at tons of gravestones. "These are all the people who've called me short or anything like that."

"Brother why"

"They deserve it that's why! I AM NOT SHORT! I AM NOT A PIPSQUEAK! I AM NOT TINY! I AM NOT A MIDGET! I AM NOT A RUNT! Anybody who's says I'm short shall suffer!"

"Well brother killing them on the Sims doesn't make them suffer."

"You're right! I must come up with a different way. I know I'll… um… uh… I'll… uh… Al help me please."

" You could make them not suffer"

"THEY MUST SUFFER!"

"Even your friends who said you're short?"

"I'M NOT SHORT AND YES THEY MUST!"

"But brother..."

"NO THEY MUST SUFFER!"

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Find out what Ed does next chapter. It's short like Ed, but this is just the introduction that's why it's so short. Please review because it will make Ed happy.

Ed: How would you know and I'M NOT SHORT.

Thank you for reading my story.

Ed: YOU'RE IGNORING ME!

Bye

Ed: HEY!


	2. Roy Mustang

Hello all you readers or reviewers. If you reviewed you made Ed and me happy.

Thank you Tornado and ooOAnimeChildOoo for reviewing. It made my day that someone reviewed one of my stories. I'm filled with happiness.

Ed: The time for my revenge has finally come!

Oh yeah! The story. Well here's chap. 2 of Ed's Revenge.

Disclaimer: Read Disclaimer of Chapter 1, I don't own FMA

Chap. 2

Roy Mustang

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"I think I'll start with Mustang." Ed stated staring at a ridiculously long list of names.

"Brother I still don't think you should be doing this" Al said

"Al, I have waited forever for my revenge I must get it."

"But brother…"

"AL! Didn't we already discuss this?"

"Yes"

"Remember our agreement"

"Yes"

-----Flash Back-----

"Will you let me get my revenge if I let you have a cat?" Ed asked Al shortly after he decided to get his revenge.

"No" Al replied

"Come on. You've always wanted a cat."

"No"

"Two cats?"

"No"

"Three?"

"No"

--A while later--

"40?"

"No"

"How about… one for each person I get my revenge on?"

"…"  
"Please Al"

"Ok" _That's a lot of cats._

-----End Flash Back-----

"How should I get my revenge on Mustang? It has to be something he can't forget. Hmmmm…"

"Oh hello Ed, Al." Riza said noticing them, as she just happened to walk by, "What's the list for."

"It's all the people I going to get my re…" Ed started before Al placed a hand over his mouth

"Roy's getting promoted and we're going to throw him a surprise party. This is a list of who we're going to invite." Al said

"I didn't here he was getting promoted."

"Please don't tell it's a secret."

"Ok."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Well bye. I have some things to do." And with that Riza left and Al took his hand off Ed's mouth.

"AL! Now what! Wait a second. I have an idea. Roy's going to have a surprise party he'll never forget. I need to contact the fuehrer and see if he can come, make invitations, figure out who invite, and figure out what we'll be doing." Ed said with an evil grin.

"Um… ok."

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What will happen at Roy's party? What does Ed need the fuehrer for? How many cats will Al own once this is over? Keep reading to find out.

I need some more people that Ed can get revenge on. Please help.

Roy: Huh! What party? I wasn't told about this!

Ed: Don't worry Roy. This will be the best party ever. (evil grin)

Al: Brother do you like the white cat or the black better?

Ed: White.

See you next chapter.


	3. Mustang's Surprise Party

I felt like changing chapter 3 because I didn't really like the original. I wasn't really thinking when I was typing it so it didn't come out the way I wanted it to. It wasn't a surprise party like it was supposed to be. So here's the redone chapter 3.

Roy: I have to suffer again?

Ed: Yes I get 2 revenges on you!

Roy: Why me?

Chapter 3:

Mustang's Surprise Party

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When Roy arrived at work that day he found it strange that no military personnel where there. He went into his office and found a note on his desk.

**Colonel Roy Mustang,**

**You are needed in the cafeteria for something immensely important.**

Roy decided to go. _Maybe that's where the rest of the military is,_ he thought.

Roy arrived at the cafeteria. When he tried to open the door it wouldn't budge.

-----Inside the cafeteria-----

The door shakes as if someone was trying to open it.

"Brother I think he's here." Al said

"Hurry up!" Ed yelled

-----Outside the cafeteria------

Roy continued to try and open the door. Finally it opened. He walked in only to find the lights off and no one inside. The lights suddenly came on and people jumped out screaming "Surprise!"

"Congratulations on being promoted." said someone. "Congratulations." said someone else.

"I'm being promoted?" Roy asked

"Yes." Replied the Fuhrer himself.

"Congratulations!" Ed said slapping him on that back so hard Roy fell face forward into the cake that said, Congratulations Roy Mustang.

Roy stood up with chocolate frosting and cake on his face.

"I'm sorry. Here's a napkin." Ed said handing Roy a napkin

Roy used the towel to wipe of the cake. Unknown to him the napkin had blue ink on it causing Roy to smear blue ink on his face.

Roy at first couldn't understand why people we're staring, laughing, or trying not to laugh at him.

Once Riza handed him a mirror he understood.

"I'm sorry." Ed said, "There's a sink over there if you wish to wash the ink off."

Roy headed towards the sink to wash off the ink that made him look like an alien. When he turned on the sink hot water sprayed him in the face.

Roy turned and glared at Ed.

"I'm sorry." Ed said a third time, "Here's a towel to dry off with."

"I'm not falling for that again." Roy replied.

So Roy sat the rest of the party, soaking wet with blue ink, chocolate frosting, and cake on his face.

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So did you like this one better? I did. Please tell me who Ed should get his revenge on next.

Al: I only had one line.

Ed: Better than none like last time.

Roy: At least it's over

King Bradley: I wasn't important

Also tell me some people who've called Ed short. See ya next chapter!


	4. Edward Elric

Hi! If you noticed chapter 3 was changed. Nobody told me who Ed should get revenge on next. So tell me this time please.

Ed: (looks at script) What! Why this person why!

Al: Renaldo my new cat, which I got because brother got revenge on Roy. He's white and fluffy. He's the best. I saw him in the rain and I just had to pick him. Then I saw a black cat…

Ed: Al the readers want to read the story. Though you can delay if you want to. I don't want this chapter to start.

Chap. 4

Edward Elric

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Ed stared at that ridiculously long list of names once again.

"Who should I get my revenge on next? I could get my revenge on Envy, Winry, Dr. Marco, Scar, Breda, Rose…" Ed said to Al

"Brother. I've been thinking." Al said as he stroked a fluffy, white cat, which he named Renaldo "Haven't you said that you were short before?"

"…Some random guy on the bus… OH NO I HAVE!"

"Does that mean you're going to get revenge on yourself?"

"I guess… I mean I did say I'd get my revenge on everyone…"

"So when are going to get revenge on yourself."  
"Last."

"Why not now? If you did it now you could get it over with."

"No! It must be last!"

"Why?"

"Cause it must! If you had to get revenge on yourself and tons of other people wouldn't you get revenge on yourself last."

"No."

"Why!"

"Cause I'd want it over with."

"How! Wait… I know what you want. You want me to pick now by picking myself so you can get that black cat that you wanted earlier. Am I correct?"

"Yes."

"Now I think about it I should get Havoc and Breda before we leave Central…"

"I think Havoc and Breda are somewhere out east."

"…Who else on this list lives in Central…"

"You're in Central now."

"…I wonder if the Homunculi are in Central currently…"

"I don't think so."

"…Maybe Scar's here…"

"BROTHER JUST DO YOURSELF!"

"Ok Al. I'm going to get revenge on myself."

"How."

"You'll see."

"Ok"

"I'm short so short so very short. I'm a midget, a dwarf, a shrimp, a pipsqueak, and a tiny person. I'm so short and everyone who says I'm short is right."

"Won't have to get revenge on yourself again now."

"No Al. That is something I'd never want to do, something that I'd normally never would do. It took all the courage I had to say that. I'm done with the revenge on myself."

"Meowwwwwwwwww" came from inside Al's armor

"Al…"

Al opened his chest plate thing and inside was the black cat Al had seen on the street that he wanted.

"So that's why you wanted me to hurry up. You knew it would meow soon and then you'd have to get rid of it unless I got revenge on someone soon."

"Yes."

"Well you're lucky it didn't meow earlier."

"Yes I know brother."

"So who should be next…"

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Yeah! Chapter 4 is done! Please tell me in your reviews who should be next if you want a certain person to be next. Also you can tell me what could happen to certain people because I'm having difficulty (well not really) thinking of how Ed should get his revenge.

Ed: I'm not having difficulty.

Al: Meet Alexander my new cat. He'll appear next chapter I hope. It depends on what The Mysterious Thing (the author) wants to happen.

Alexander and Renaldo are awesome aren't they! I'm a cat lover so I'm glad I could fit cats into the story.

See you next chapter.


	5. A Reviewer

A reviewer told me that I have a lot talking in this fanfic and that the fuehrer is Pride. I decided not to cut down on the talking scenes because that would make it harder for me to write the story and it might cause me to ruin the story. But if other people say there is too much talking I might. I know the fuehrer is Pride and I will mention something like a compromise between them. Here's chap. 5.

Chapter 5

A Reviewer

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Ed stared for the third time at his ridiculously long list of names.

"Brother I've been thinking again…" Al started to say

"You're not hiding another cat are you?" Ed asked

"No."

"Good."

"A reviewer called you an elf"

"WHAT! Who?"

"Kaori-chan92"

"…"

"Are thinking about how you should get you're revenge?"

"Yes."

"Why not wait and do someone else?"

"I need to get revenge now or else…"  
"You'll forget?"

"I'd never forget something like that. I meant the author might forget."

(Me: I wouldn't forget!)

"Yes you would. But anyways the author says we have to do it so we have to."

(Me: You don't have to but you should so that way I really don't forget that she said that…)

"See Al"

"Ok…"

"I have an idea on how to get my revenge."

"What is it?"

"Kaori-chan92 can't read this story ever again!"

"How will you do that?"

"I don't know… wait I do know! I hate you Kaori-chan92 and so does Al and everybody else!"

"I don't hate Kaori-chan92…"  
"Yes you do!"

"Um… ok" Al then whispered so Ed couldn't here and only the people reading this could "No I don't"

"Al did you whisper something?"

"No."

"You're lying to me!"

"I'm not…"

"You are."

"Also that's not a good way to get revenge."

"Yes it is. If someone is a fan of ours than they'll hate it if we hate them."

"How do you know?"

"I don't. I just think it would. I hate you Kaori-chan92!"

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So there's chapter 5. I'll mention the deal Ed makes with Pride next chapter before more people are saying that the Fuehrer is Pride (which I knew already so don't think I just didn't know that).

Ed: Kaori-chan92 I don't really hate you.

Al: Alexander didn't get to appear.

Kaori-chan92 I hope you don't mind that you are in the fanfic. If you do please let me know then I can take out the chapter or something.


	6. A Comprimise with Pride

Sorry about the long wait for the next chapter. I was um… I guess just not in the mood for writing more chapters (bad excuse right?). Also I need to know if the Fuehrer/Pride ever called Ed a shrimp, shorty, pipsqueak, midget, etc?

Chapter 6:

A Comprimise with Pride

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"Brother I've been thinking…" Al started to say

"Al why do always have to say that at the beginning of a chapter?" Ed questioned

"I don't know."

"Ok. Well, what were you thinking?"

"When you got you revenge on Mustang…"

"Yes…"

"And the Fuehrer helped you…"

"Yes…"

"Get revenge…

"AL GET TO THE POINT!"

"The Fuehrer is a homunculus so how did you get him to help you?"

"Well Al that is a long story so we'll need a flashback for that."

------Flashback------

Ed waited not so calmly for the Fuehrer to finish somethings that had been going on for over 6 hours.

"WHAT IS HE DOING THAT IS SO IMPORTANT!" Ed yelled

Just then Ms. Douglas (Sloth) opened the door so Ed could come see the Fuehrer. She took him back to a very far away room. After walking down hallways for 1 hour the arrived at the room the Fuehrer.

"How many rooms does the Fuehrer have to himself?" Ed asked quietly so Sloth wouldn't hear.

"50" Sloth replied

"I wasn't asking you."

Sloth left as Ed entered the room the Fuehrer (Pride) was in.

"I need you help for something and…" Ed started before the Pride interrupted

"What is this something?" Pride asked

"Getting revenge on people like Envy and since you're a homunculus I thought might be able to help me with people like that."

"What will I get if I help you?"

"After I use the Philosopher's Stone you can have it."

"Maybe but why are you getting revenge?"

"BECAUSE TALL PEOPLE THINK IT'S OK TO MAKE FUN OF THE NOT TALL PEOPLE'S HEIGHT!"

"…"

"So will you help me?"

"Ok…"

------End Flashback-------

"So that's how I got the Fuehrer to help me." Ed said

"Brother…" Al started

"What?"

"Why would we give them the Philosopher's Stone?"

"SO I CAN GET MY REVENGE! That's why."

"Oh"

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Chapter 6 is now finished. I'll try not to take so long to update this time. I have another question I need answered. Which of the homunculi called Ed shorty, runt, dwarf, pipsqueak, etc.

Ed: I didn't get to get revenge on anyone…

Al: I didn't get a cat….

This was an important part of the story line I had to put this in.

Ed: You could have still let me get revenge…

Al: And me a cat…


	7. Envy

I have reached chapter 7 and not quit writing! Normally when I'm writing something I end up quitting after 3 pages (or 1).

Ed: Why do you have to say pointless things at the beginning that take so long and I have to wait to get my revenge.

Because I want to. I'm the authoress anyway.

Chap. 7

Envy

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"Brother I've been…" Al started before Ed interrupted

"AL IF YOU SAY THAT ONE MORE TIME YOU ARE NOT GETTING ANOTHER CAT AND YOU'LL HAVE TO FIND HOMES FOR RENALDO, ALEXANDER, AND AL JR.!" Ed yelled

"Yes brother." Al held Renaldo (who he got because Ed got revenge on Roy), Alexander (who he got because Ed got revenge on himself), and Al Jr. (who he got because Ed got revenge on Kaori-chan92) closer.

"Anyways what we're you thinking?"

"You're not really going to give me to the Fuehrer (who is Pride), right?"

"Well I told him I would so yeah. I think I'm going to get my revenge on Envy next."

Al sadly looked at his cats (can armor even look sad?). "I'm sure he has a plan to prevent him from having to give me to the Fuehrer."

"Al you want to help me."

"No."

"Why?"

"I don't want to."

"Why?"

"I just don't want to."

"You can have an extra cat if you help me."

"No."

"I not really going to give you to the Fuehrer… well maybe. But then I'll take you back… somehow."

"Ok I'll help."

"Good."

---At the Pride's office---

"So you require my help to get your revenge on Envy?" Pride asked

"Yes." Ed said

"What do you need my help for?"

Ed told something to Pride which you cannot know because it is a surprise.

---Later with Homunculi---

Pride put some kind of powder, which cannot be mentioned now but you will find out by end of the chapter, into Envy's glass of water.

After about 3 hours of waiting Envy eventually drank some of it. In a couple of minutes Envy was fast asleep. Pride's part was not over though he still had something to do…

---With Ed and Al---

Ed started laughing evilly as he thought of what he was doing to get revenge on Envy.

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Do you now know what that powder was? It was sleeping powder stuff or whatever it's called. Anyways what's Ed planning to do? I already know of course which is one of the advantages of writing to story. But writing it is also a disadvantage because I never get to be surprised by something in story.

Al: My cats appeared once again! And brother not really going to just hand me over to the homunculi!

Ed: You really thought I was going to?

Al: Yeah


	8. For Sale

I HAVE UPDATED! Sorry for the long wait. It's been 5 months almost. If it was the 11th it would be exactly 5 months.

Ed: I had to wait so long to get my revenge.

Al: I had to wait for a cat. I think I'll name my new one Nina.

Nina (the cat): meow

Chap. 8

For Sale!

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"Pride's late" Ed said

"How's he late we've been waiting for 5 minutes!" Al replied

"That's too long. Envy has called me pipsqueak almost as much as Mustang."

"Then why didn't you do him second?"

"If I remember correctly you forced me to get revenge on myself."

"Yeah."

About then Pride (the Fuehrer) showed up. "I did my part when will I get the Philosopher's Stone." Pride questioned

"Not 'til I'm done. Isn't that what we agreed to." Ed replied

"No. We agreed to you giving it to me once you are done with it"

"I'll be done with it after getting my revenge!"

Pride then left to take care of whatever the Fuehrer does all day.

"Brother what are you doing to get revenge on Envy?" Al asked

"Oh… yeah"

---At somewhere where you sell trees and plants and stuff---

Envy (a.k.a. the palm tree) was planted in a pot for sale to any random person who decided to buy him. His arms were tied to his side and he was sleeping standing up in a pot filled with dirt.

In a miniature forest of potted oak trees Ed and Al watched waiting to see who was going to buy Envy.

"Brother you're selling him as a palm tree?" Al asked

"Yeah." Ed replied

"Who is going to think he's a palm tree!"

"When did they start selling palm trees?" Someone thought aloud

"Wow a palm tree!" Someone exclaimed

"Only one palm tree left. I wonder if they can survive where I live?" Another person said

"Them." Ed replied

"Ok. Then who's going to buy him?" Al asked

"Mom look a palm tree!" A little boy said excitedly

"Yes Jimmy, that's a palm tree." The mother replied

"Can we get a palm tree? It's better than that butterfly bush that doesn't look like a butterfly." Jimmy said

"No and the butterfly bush attracts butterflies not grow shaped as a butterfly." The mother replied

"That's boring. Palm trees are better."

"Jimmy, we're not getting a palm tree."

"Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"

"No."

"Why?"

"Jimmy palm trees grow near the ocean."

Ed suddenly jumped out of the oak tree forest dressed as a worker here.

"Actually this palm tree is special. It's grows ANYWHERE! You can plant it in rocks and it will still grow!" Ed said

"Coooooooooooool." Said Jimmy "Can we get it mom?"

"Jimmy he doesn't work here. He's too young. He looks like he's 12." Jimmy's mom replied

"I'M NOT SHORT AND I'M NOT 12 YOU ARE JUST RIDICULOUSLY TALL AND THAT IS WHY I APPEAR SHORT TO YOU WHEN I AM NOT!" Ed screamed

"Brother…" Al said from the trees stroking Al Jr.

"My what a temper." Jimmy's mother said

"Mom can we get the tree." Jimmy asked

"I guess." Jimmy's mother replied (Ok I'm tired of typing Jimmy's mother. She will now be referred to as Suzy).

"Yeah!" Jimmy cheered

And so Envy was sold to Jimmy and Suzy.

Ed and Al followed Jimmy and Suzy home. Ed wanted to make sure horrible things happened to Envy cause if nothing bad happened Envy Ed wouldn't have truly gotten his revenge.

"I didn't know they lived in Resembool." Al stated.

"Me neither. Well we have been gone for three years maybe they moved here after we left." Ed replied

Suzy, Jimmy, and Jimmy's father (who we'll call Bob) planted Envy.

"Why is there concrete covering its roots?" Suzy asked

"I don't know." Bob replied

"Does it need water?" Jimmy asked

"Of course, Jimmy" Suzy answered

Suzy and Bob went inside. Jimmy stayed out for a bit. He then decided to get a hose to water his new palm tree. He dragged the hose over to Envy. Then he went to turn it on… on full power. He picked up the hose to aim it spraying Envy in his face finally waking the sleeping homunculus.

Jimmy finally pointed the hose at Envy's feet (which are in the ground) It took Envy awhile to figure out he was being watered by a 7-year-old.

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And that's were I will end this chapter. Envy's is a three-parter. Anyways Envy's feet are in concrete to prevent escape and so whoever bought him wouldn't be like "WHY DOES MY PALM TREE HAVE FEET!".

Ed: I will get revenge on Suzy!

Al: But brother she's just a fictional person used for this story.

Suzy: hits Al on head with frying pan knocking off his 'head' I am not fictional.

Well until next time which hopefully isn't as long.

Al: MY HEAD!

Suzy: Empty suit of armor… empty… empty…


	9. Mr Palm Tree

I'm on chapter 9 that makes me happy! I've also got over 50 reviews! I forgot to say last chapter that Rose is next.

Rose: I'm next for what?

Ed: It's nothing… yet.

Al: Why's Rose next?

She was requested. By the way there is no language in here so if you don't like it add it in your mind.

PsycoNeko15 – I thought about that and decided for the point of the story Envy just won't break the concrete.

Chap. 9

Mr. Palm Tree

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Envy stared at Jimmy for a while before "WHY HAVE YOU PLANTED ME AND NOW WATERING ME! I'M NO PALM TREE YOU IDIOT!"

"Cool my palm tree talks." Jimmy replied.

"I just said I'm not a palm tree." Envy said

"I've got to tell all my friends! Hold on Mr. Palm Tree!" Jimmy yelled running to his house.

Suzy then walked out saying "I've told Jimmy a thousand times to clean up after himself but nooooo he leaves the hose running."

"Hey, you, dig me up me…" but that was all Envy could say because Suzy started screaming and ran back to her house.

Jimmy's father (who I will call Bill) came out holding a shovel and followed by Suzy.

"Bill, the palm t-tree it's h-haunted." Suzy said

"Palm trees aren't haunted. A ghost wouldn't posses a palm tree." Bill replied

"But… it t-talked." Said Suzy

"I'm sure it did." Bill said rolling his eyes.

"Is that to dig me up me? After that untie me this isn't normal rope." But once again Envy was interrupted by Bill hitting him on the side of his head with the shovel knocking him out.

"So it does talk. Good thing for that course on exorcism." Bill said.

"You took a course on exorcism?" asked Suzy

"Yes I did."

"When?"

"Every Wednesday night for the past 10 weeks."

"You said you were golfing."

"Um… well I thought you might forbid me from taking it."

"Whatever. Just exorcise it."

Bill set up for it. Then he began. (I know nothing on exorcism so we'll just skip to when Bill is done.)

"There you go. One exorcised palm tree." Bill said.

Envy who woke up during the exorcism ceremony said, "I'm NOT a palm tree!"

"I knew I should have taken the advanced class." Bill said mostly to himself.

About then Jimmy ran out. "MR. PALM TREE!" He screamed.

"Jimmy. We are returning the palm tree." Suzy said.

"Awwwwwwwwwwwww." Jimmy replied

Bill repotted Envy and took him back to the store Jimmy and Suzy bought him at.

"I'm sorry but I think you have the wrong store. We don't sell palm trees." An employee said.

"I'm not a PALM TREE!" Envy yelled loud enough for the whole store to hear.

The employee stared and stared and stared. "Um… I don't think that is a palm tree."

So they took Envy out of the pot, untied him, and Envy broke the concrete himself.

"Well Al, that went well. Now who's next…" Ed said from their hiding place in the butterfly bush section.

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As I said at the top Rose is next.

Ed: Will I ever get revenge on Suzy?

If we have time, yes unless the readers don't want to read it.

Ed: WELL I WANT MY REVENGE!

Al: Brother…


	10. Rose

Another chapter, another person Ed gets revenge on. Thanks to G4 Fan Man and SeaLover456 for the ideas of what Ed can do to get his revenge on Rose.

Ed: I love getting revenge on people. Especially Rose!

Al: Brother…

Ed: Al stop saying 'Brother…'

Chap. 10

Rose

------------------------

"Al, I got it!" Ed exclaimed.

"What brother?" Al asked holding Nina his newest cat.

"I will get my revenge on… ROSE!" Ed said.

"Why Rose."

"I feel like it."

"Brother we're nowhere near Lior."

"So."

"Brother…"

---Later when Ed and Al arrive in Lior---

"Ok Al I'll need your help." Ed said.

"What do you need done." Al asked.

"I'll show you." Ed answered.

----Later with Ed----

"Ok while Al's getting ready I need to find Rose." Ed said.

Conveniently Rose walked by right then.

"Rose!" Ed yelled

"Oh hi Edward (Does Rose call him Edward or Ed? I forgot.)." Rose said.

"Hey Rose I just happened to be passing through Lior and I thought I should stop by and see you." Ed said

"Edward that is so nice."

"Rose I saw something interesting on my way in. Can I show it to you and you tell me what it is?"

"Sure."

---At a fountain---

"Edward this is just a fountain." Rose said

"What's that though" Ed said pointing to a rooftop a person stood on top of holding something above his/her head with the sun behind him/her so it was just a silhouette.

"I… I don't know."

"Why don't you go look?"

"Ok."

Rose climbed up a ladder probably belonged to whoever stood up there and she saw… AL! Al stood there holding a bottle of salad dressing over his head.

"Sorry Rose." Al said opening it.

Al walked over and dumped the salad dressing (not the bottle though) down her dress.

Rose stood there for a while before heading back to her house to change and clean up. Of course Ed stood in her doorway.

"Hi Rose. This is what you get for calling me short." Ed said.

"Edward may I please get into my home." Rose said.

"Not unless you streak here in public in front of all these people."

"Brother that wasn't part of the plan." Al said

"Well it is now!" Ed shouted.

"Edward. Please let me through." Rose pleaded

"Streak then I'll let you in."

"Edward…"

"You heard me."

"Can you change your mind."

"Nope."

"Please."

"Rose streak or spend all day with salad dressing down your dress."

"Edward…"

"Rose, do it."

"FINE I WILL" Rose screamed streaking.

"Ok…" Ed said

----Later on train to Central----

"Well that went well… in a way…" Ed said.

"Brother…" Al said.

"Al stop saying 'Brother…'"

"Ok."

"Now who should be next…"

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Next is Suzy. Just so I don't forget about her and Ed gets mad at me.

Ed: Well of course I would be mad at you if I couldn't get revenge on someone!

If you want a certain person to be next after Suzy just request him or her.


	11. Suzy

SakuraSagura thank you for the long list of people. Thank you to everyone else who also told me some people for Ed to get revenge on.

Running out of things to say in my author notes so on with Suzy!

Ed: REVENGE!

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Bill, Suzy, and Jimmy are my unimportant side character OCs though.

Chap. 11

Suzy

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"Al. I know who I'll do next!" Ed shouted.

"Who?" Al asked becoming bored with Ed getting revenge.

"SUZY!" Ed shouted.

"But brother she's just a random person who said you looked like you were 12."

"Still I must get my revenge."

"Brother… why not someone else?"

"Al! Think of the cats! I get revenge on Suzy you get a cat!"

"Cats…" Al said going off to Catland in his mind.

------Outside Suzy's house----------

"See you, honey!" Bill shouted, "I'm off to golf!"

"Bill, don't lie." Suzy said

"Ok fine I'm off to my advanced exorcism classes!"

"What to do… what to do… what to do…" Ed said hidden in the bushes thinking.

"There are exorcism classes?" Al asked.

"Of course Al. He used his knowledge from them on Envy remember."

"Oh yeah!"

"What to do… what to do… what to do… what to do… what to do… what to do… what to do… what to do… I GOT IT!"

"What is it?"

"Al go talk to her for a while."

"Why?"

"Don't question me."

"Ok…"

------A while later------

"Um… I would… like too… ask you if you would…" Al started before Suzy interrupted him.

"If you're trying to sell me or my little boy Jimmy something…" Suzy growled.

"Um… no that's not it. I just would like you to um… answer some questions."

"Why should I?"

"You… could… win a free… vacation."

"Ok! Ask away! Wait. How do I know I'll really win a vacation?"

"Um…" _Brother, come soon _Al thought.

"MOM!" Jimmy ran out of the house screaming, "SOMEONE'S STEALING OUR FLOUR!"

"Brother…" Al said

"A FLOWER THEIF! I'LL GET HIM! HE WON'T GET HIS HANDS ON MY TULIPS!" Suzy yelled.

"No not flower, flour!" Jimmy said.

"That's what I said."

"F-L-O-U-R"

"Oh. WELL HE WON'T GET MY FLOUR!" Suzy yelled running into her house with Al and Jimmy right behind her.

"Stop!" She yelled as she burst into her kitchen.

In the middle of her kitchen stood a flour-covered Ed. "I am the ghost of the not so tall people." Ed moaned, "I am here to punish you for calling the worker at Plants 'R Us not so tall."

"What!" Suzy said shocked, "When!"

"Recently." Ed moaned, "If you wish to avoid punishment do not call not so tall people short ever again."

"That's a short ghost mom!" Jimmy said.

"Jimmy! Respect the ghost" Suzy said to Jimmy before saying to Ed, "I-ignore m-my son p-p-please, h-he d-didn't mean i-it. I-I will also l-listen t-to what y-you said."

"Mom. That's the thief covered in flour not a ghost." Jimmy said.

"N-no it's n-n-not J-Jimmy it's a g-ghost."

"I will be on my way. I will spare you and your son for now." Ed moaned before using alchemy to make a cloud of smoke so he could disappear.

"That s-scared me so m-much. I'm so a-afraid of g-ghosts." Suzy said.

-----On train to next destination-----

"Brother, how did you know Suzy was afraid of ghosts?" Al asked.

"Because remember how she acted when she thought Envy was haunted." Ed replied.

"Yeah."

"Next is…"

"Brother we always end each chapter like that."

"Yeah we do."

------Bonus Section-------

(DaRLinG1357 suggested revenge on her younger brother. Here it is.)

"Aaron HOW DARE YOU CALL ME SHORT AND SHRIMP! FOR THAT EVERYONE IN FMA HAS DECIDED THEY HATE YOU!" Ed yelled.

"Actually brother that's not true." Al said.

"Al, I hate you. You always ruin this idea by saying 'No we don't hate you'. Anyways I'll change it! Um… uh… Boy it's hard to get revenge on readers and reader's siblings. So anyways I'll leave it with hating you!"

--------------------------

DaRLinG1357 or Aaron if you would like the Bonus Section removed I'll remove it.

Next is either Russell (the person who said he was Ed) or Pinako. Vote on who you want!

An Interesting tidbit on Ed's height. Ed without his shoes is 4'11". Yugi Moto (From Yu-Gi-Oh!) who everyone thinks is shorter than Ed is 5'.

Ed: WHAT! NO!

He is taller than Hiei who is 4'10" and Genkai who is 4'3" (both from Yu Yu Hakusho and around Ed's age or older) though.

Ed: YES! I AM TALLER THAN SOMEONE AL!

Al: Brother…


	12. Russell

I haven't updated in a while so I… updated.

I would like to thank SwirlyDragonfly for the really long list of people Ed's taller than or the same height as.

Ed: Wow! I'm taller than a lot of people!

Russell won in the votes so Russell's up next.

Chap. 12

Russell

---------------------------

--On train to Xenotime—

"Al I shall now get my revenge on… Russell!" Ed said

"Why not Winry while we were in Resembool?" Al asked

"…"

"Brother?"

"…I don't know…"

"Ok."

"Anyways I came up with a great idea that I can only do to Russell."

"So… couldn't you have waited to do Russell?"

"I could have forgotten the idea."

"You could have written it down."

"I could have lost the paper."

"You could have given it to me to hold."

"Al, don't argue with me."

"…Ok."

----In Xenotime----

"And then we'll have him! Ok, Al you know what to do right?" Ed asked.

"Yes." Al replied

"Good. Now go and do it."

Unbeknownst to the Elric brothers an ominous shadow hid in the bushes nearby listening in on their plan. "So that's their plan," the ominous shadow said.

----With Al----

"Now where would Russell be?" Al wondered aloud.

"Are you talking 'bout the alchemist?" a man asked?

"Yes. Do you know where he is?"

"Yep."

"Where is he?"

"I don't know. Ask his brother."

"Where's Fletcher then?"

"Fletcher's his name? Didn't know that. Anyways he's right next to you."

"Hi." Fletcher said startling Al.

"Oh! Hi, Fletcher. I didn't see you. Where's Russell?" Al asked.

"I think he's over that way."

"Which way?"

"Follow me." Fletcher said leading Al down a narrow street.

----With Ed----

"This is brilliant! I'm brilliant! Russell's not brilliant!" Ed said happily. "Oh look! There's Al and… someone. Russell I think."

Ed dove into nearby bushes only to find out to late… they were rose bushes. "Ouch!" Ed yelled, stumbling into… his trap.

The trap used all it's complicated mechanical stuff (that I'll leave up to you to imagine) and succeeded in its original purpose… well except that it was intentioned for Russell not Ed but still. Anyways it ended up with Ed in a pile of manure.

"Brother…" Al said.

--------------------------

Hopefully you won't mind the short chapter since I did update. If you do… I don't care. I'll try to start updating more.

Anyways, Russell is obviously more than one chapter.

Ed: Why! Why! Why were there rosebushes there!

Because they were. That's all for Chapter 12. Yeah.


End file.
